Why is confession to our leaders required for some things?
Question
Gramps,
What happens if you break the law of chastity and repent to God but don’t confess to the bishop/branch pres?
I want to fully repent but I just can’t confess to the branch president… it’s too embarrassing and awkward. My branch president knows me well (small branch) and I don’t want him to think badly of me. I understand why it could be helpful for some people but why is it mandatory for full repentance? What will happen to me if I never get the courage to confess?
Ally
Answer
Ally,
Repentance is always between you and the Lord. However, some acts put your status in the Lord’s kingdom in question. In such cases, the Lord has commanded that we present ourselves humbly before our leaders, whom God has given charge of His kingdom, and confess our sins, then forsake them. You cannot complete your repentance without visiting with your branch president. If you would prefer, you can go talk to your stake president (or district president, if you don’t live in a stake), but he will in turn send you back to talk with your branch president.
Your branch president has been given the duty and authority to hear situations like yours and to know by the Spirit how best to help you. This is not about humiliating you; it’s about helping you get past this. I really do understand how uncomfortable and embarrassing this seems to you, but have faith in God. This is the system He has set up. Go talk with your branch president. Things will be okay.
Gramps
Ally,
Let’s put this into perspective here. Who cares if your branch president knows what you did? If you repent, the LORD has promised to forget the whole thing ever happened. On the other hand, if you don’t and die in your sins, I am pretty confident EVERYONE will know what you did at judgment day, because the scriptures say this:
1 Corinthians 4:5
“Therefore judge nothing before the time, until the Lord come, who both will bring to light the hidden things of darkness, and will make manifest the counsels of the hearts: and then shall every man have praise of God.”
Rom. 2:16
“In the day when God shall judge the secrets of men by Jesus Christ according to my gospel.”
Jeremiah 16:17
“For mine eyes are upon all their ways: they are not hid from my face, neither is their iniquity hid from mine eyes.”
This leaves the question: Do you fear GOD or do you fear MAN? But why should you even care what any man thinks? This is what the scriptures have to say about men:
Isaiah 51:12
“I, even I, am he that comforteth you: who art thou, that thou shouldest be afraid of a man that shall die, and of the son of man which shall be made as grass;”
1 Peter 1:24
“For all flesh is as grass, and all the glory of man as the flower of grass. The grass withereth, and the flower thereof falleth away:”
Psalms 103:15-18
“15 As for man, his days are as grass: as a flower of the field, so he flourisheth.
16 For the wind passeth over it, and it is gone; and the place thereof shall know it no more.
17 But the amercy of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting upon them that fear him, and his righteousness unto children’s children;
18 To such as keep his covenant, and to those that remember his commandments to do them.”
In all honesty, nobody is perfect and their are varying degrees of sins, but I’m sure anyone who is sincerely trying to follow Christ has at one point or another sat across the desk from an ecclesiastical leader, and confessed to something or another just to be sure we are being truthful and not under the Lord’s condemnation. That includes myself.
Look at the Book of Mormon, for example. Alma, who was one of the priests of Noah, was most likely involved in breaking the law of Chastity. Then what happens? Abinadi the prophet comes and prophecies of their destruction and Alma repents. What happened to him after that? Well, he became a prophet.
Let’s look at what Abinadi says to King Noah and his priests:
Mosiah 12:29
“And again he said unto them: If ye teach the law of Moses why do ye not keep it? Why do ye set your hearts upon riches? Why do ye commit whoredoms and spend your strength with harlots, yea, and cause this people to commit sin, that the Lord has cause to send me to prophesy against this people, yea, even a great evil against this people?”
Now let’s look at what Alma had to say about his own actions:
Mosiah 23:9
“But remember the iniquity of king Noah and his priests; and I myself was caught in a snare, and did many things which were abominable in the sight of the Lord, which caused me sore repentance;”
So as you can see, repentance IS possible. But if you want to make it even more simple, Heavenly Father already knew EVERY mistake you would make in this life even before He sent you here. This is the entire reason He also sent his Son, Jesus Christ to perform the atonement. If not, every last one of us would NEVER be able to go back to live with Him again.
To make this even more simple:
1. Do you stop being a daughter of God, because you made a mistake? No.
2. Does Heavenly Father love you any less for making a mistake? No.
3. Did Heavenly Father send Jesus Christ to atone for those same mistakes? Yes.
4. Does Heavenly Father want you to come back to live with Him again? Yes.
As is evident from all the answers to these questions here, HEAVENLY FATHER IS ON YOUR SIDE. And if that’s the case, it’s as simple as doing what He said. Now what is it He said to do and what is the promise?
Doctrine and Covenants 58:43
“By this ye may know if a man repenteth of his sins—behold, he will confess them and forsake them.”
Doctrine and Covenants 58:42
“Behold, he who has repented of his sins, the same is forgiven, and I, the Lord, remember them no more.”
Now if you understand what I’m saying, take the fear of man and throw it to the wind, and follow God. You’ll be alright.
I certainly hope you aren’t advising this young woman that there is no need to visit her Bishop over breaking the Law of Chastity. That’s almost what I get from your comment.
Wow. You 100% misread what I said there. I might ask you to reread my response.
I specifically made it a point to show there’s no reason to fear talking about a problem to an ecclesiastical leader. I mean, why should you fear? In the end, they are a man like any other.
Think about it. Do you go to tithing settlement and fear to answer your bishop/branch president if you paid a full tithe or not? I sure don’t. My only concern is if I have been honest with the Lord. If I make a mistake, sure I’ll talk openly with my church leader about it, but why should I fear him? Because of his position? He’s supposed to be the shepherd of his flock and if he’s not, well, like Jacob says of those whose job it is for leaders to guide: “[T]heir blood would come upon our garments, and we would not be found spotless at the last day.”
Look, people mess up, we all mess up, and so what? Heavenly Father, in His infinite wisdom, knew it would happen long before we were ever born and exactly why He provided us a Savior. So let’s get it together and help each other get back on track. Anybody who thinks they don’t mess up and sin (some of us more than others) is just fooling themselves. Besides, isn’t the gospel supposed to be the “GOOD TIDINGS OF GOOD”?
Not denying the gravity of certain sins or anything, but what profit is it to us to drag the LITERAL SPIRIT CHILDREN of our Heavenly Father, even our own SPIRIT BROTHERS AND SISTERS, through the mud? Should we kick people when they’re down and when their minds and hearts are already racked with guilt or should we lend them a hand of charity and compassion and pick them up? The answer is clear to me. We have both the parable of the Prodigal Son and the Lost Sheep, but let me quote Isaiah for good measure:
Isaiah 52:7
“How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him that bringeth good tidings, that publisheth peace; that bringeth good tidings of good, that publisheth salvation; that saith unto Zion, Thy God reigneth!”
I stand with Isaiah on this matter. That said, if we are not here to let people know there is hope despite all the turmoil in life, despite all the sadness, despite all the disappointment and failure, then what are we publishing and how are we shining our light?
I enjoyed your response. We can lose perspective in our fear of confessing to a mortal man
I would just like to say thanks to ALL the responses (Including Gramps of course). I have just last week gone back to Church and know that I have to see the Bishop for the very same thing, after I had left the Church and my marriage had broken up. For the past few years, Satan has ‘encouraged’ me not to go; that it is too late for me, that it will be embarrassing, humiliating to face the Bishop. This was even overriding my guilt. But I have taken he first step by going back. And as the Lord would have it, I now find the answers I need at the right time. Thank you to all once again. And thank you to the Lord. I feel so blessed that Christ is willing to give me a second chance after doing something so terrible.
Confession to the Lord’s representatives of serious matters such as the law of chastity is indeed a requirement of repentance. And I’ve been meeting with my bishops for 10 years over a particularly difficult problem and I’ve almost never had a rotten experience, the vast majority of bishops and branch presidents are inspired and holy, kind and compassionate and almost always full of love. I’ve only had 1 or 2 out of probably about 10 bishops that were unkind, judgmental and unhelpful, and even they were more than compassionate and caring for the first few times I had to come in.
I’ve never ever had a bishop get mad at me, or be uncharitable the first few times I’ve confessed. They are human. so sometimes repeat confessions made 1 or 2 lose patience but then the idea of repentance is forsaking sin, not just confessing it so to an extent their frustration is understandable even if not justified. But the vast and great majority have been consistently kind and patient with me even despite my many repeat sins. Such is addiction. Often I have seen myself as the woman with an issue of blood who Christ heals. I’ll get there one day, and I just gotta have faith in God and keep trying.
To the original question asker, often fears about confessing to the Bishop are misplaced. Most Bishops love and care for the members of their wards. I’ve known this first hand. Don’t worry. It’s just social stigma and no body needs to know what you talk about unless you tell them. I honestly think every person whether a serious sinner or not should meet regularly with the Bishop. Meeting regularly every Sunday for 10 years has helped me spiritually tremendously, simply as a result of meeting with an inspired priesthood leader. I promise you if you go you more than likely won’t regret it and will be glad you did.
Hang in there, my brother. We love you!
Just like good mothers can be said to be a nation’s pride, so are humble men who rely on the Lord. May God bless and strengthen you!
One reason (among many) why we need to confess sins like these to the bishop is because they cause a loss of the Holy Ghost. The still, small voice is gone. Thus a person is left in darkness with no way to discern the Lord’s will on how to work through their repentance, what to do, what not to do, how to act, etc. Another reason, for men, is that these types of sins causes loss of priesthood authority (at least as far as the heavens are concerned). Thus, blessings given do not work, things done by the priesthood are not acknowledged in heaven, etc. In short, a person’s eternal progression is STOPPED cold. Like a river, they are damned and cannot move further. The bishop/branch president holds the keys to unlock the door and allow progression to continue. It can happen in no other way.
You just randomly say things without any references/doctrine or anything to support it. You have no idea what your talking about!
its as simple as this… you are a church member, and by church it means, an organized way to manage salvation. This organized way, named leaders and you supported them by rising your hand, and as a good member of any organization, you play by the rules, and this rules includes confession in some matters. So basically, you want to be there, play by the rules. NOTE, this does not mean that God, or the Heavenly Father is going to agree with every single decision your leaders made, in any way. So think about that… wanna be here, play by the rules…