Will one still experience same sex attraction after the resurrection?
Question
Hello Gramps,
I have a question that is very important to me and I cannot find the answer. I am a returned missionary, temple-married mother and wife who is active and faithful in the gospel and temple worthy. I am also gay. It is a constant struggle in my marriage and my life. It is a core part of who I am and does not change with any amount of prayer, fasting and obedience. My question is : Will I still experience same sex attraction after the resurrection?  Many thanks.
Kel
Answer
Hi Kel,
I want to start off by stating that it sounds like you are doing a wonderful job. Â You have shown remarkable faith and courage in setting aside temptation and becoming an active, temple-worthy mother. Â I think it is safe to say that the Lord loves you very much and is very proud of you.
As for your question, I went looking for a conference talk from a General Authority regarding healing from same sex attraction in the next life. Â I wound up finding something even better.
In the Eternal Marriage Student Manual,  there is a chapter on Same-Gender Attraction.  Much of the chapter is taken from an old Ensign article written by Elder Dallin H. Oaks.  In that chapter, Elder Oaks recognizes that “All of us have some feelings we did not choose”.  He then states that “God has promised that he will consecrate our afflictions for our gain (see 2 Ne. 2:2).  The efforts we expend in overcoming any inherited [or developed] weakness builds a spiritual strength that will serve us throughout eternity.  Thus, when Paul prayed thrice that his ‘thorn in the flesh’ would depart from him, the Lord replied, ‘My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness.'”  In other words, not only will the Lord help us overcome feelings such as same sex attraction in either this life or the next, but, if we let him, he will turn this affliction into strength that will serve us throughout all eternity!
The Lord loves you very much, more than you can ever imagine. Â Have faith, and keep doing such a great job, and in either this life or the next life, the Lord will heal you.
Gramps
I’m asexual. When I was married I had relations with my husband to have a baby but that was unsuccessful. I am past menopause and have zero sex drive. I just cannot understand why someone wants sex if they can’t have a baby. I hope in the resurrection I will find out what all the excitement is all about.
Kel:
There are a number of posts on “Accent on Mormon Beliefs”. If you search for “Accent on Mormon Beliefs”, scroll down and click on the scriptures, then go to the topical guide, he has several posts. One is on “God gives us weaknesses”, and there are several under different posts on same sex attraction. I think you will find them interesting. But I believe with Gramps that the Lord Loves you more than you can imagine, and just hang in there. You will not have this same sex attraction after you are Resurrected. Von
Kel and Gramps,
Kel, thank you for the question. Although I don’t struggle with your feelings, I do have one that I am working on.
Gramps, thanks for your answer and the reference. I needed that answer in reference to my own problem. It will help me carry on.
Kel,
thank you for your courage to address this. I don’t know if this will help, but I’ll give it a try:
The second great commandment is to love thy neighbor as thyself. It contains: Love thyself! Do you love yourself? The Lord knows you and the desires of your heart. And HE loves you. Have you truly poored out your heart before him? Did you discuss your struggle with him? Did you ask him (like Paul did) to remove it? Did you pray until you heard his voice speaking to your spirit? What did he say to you? Did he say that he will not remove it and you will have to endure? Did you feel his love? Did you feel him put his arms around you and hold you? Did you cry unto him? Did he say that he will make your burden easy? Did you ask him to make your burden easy?
I know this to be true: 3 Nephi 14:7 Ask, and it shall be given unto you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you. 8 For EVERY ONE that asketh, receiveth; and he that seeketh, findeth; and to him that knocketh, it shall be opened. 9 Or what man is there of you, who, if his son ask bread, will give him a stone? 10 Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent? 11 If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father who is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?
And I add: But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. Doubt not, fear not.